You are the only one that can make you happy

You are the only one that can make you happyWhat makes you happy? For many people when they ask this question they respond with answers like winning the lottery, having a job that makes you happy and that pays well, having a loving relationship e.c.t. These things definitely help in creating a happy life, but depending on the circumstances, you may find that these things only last for a short-term. For example, what happens if your partner leaves you for someone else? Or you have lost all your winnings from lotto as a result of bad investments? If you are not in control of your emotions and have things go wrong in your life, you may end up falling into a dark hole of misery and find that your previous happiness was only a fleeting memory. I believe that happiness is not a permanent state. If you find that you are only relying on outside circumstances for your happiness you are in danger of living a life full of misery. I believe that people who seem happy no matter what their circumstance may be are happy because they have the ability to know that they have the knowledge that no matter what life may throw at them, they have the strength and fortitude to withstand the storms of life. Here is a great book that covers the subject of happiness very well Live Happy: Ten Practices for Choosing Joy In this post I would like to talk about two ways that have helped me when it comes to staying positive and happy regardless of what life may throw up.

Let go of what you can’t control

In this life you never know what lies around the corner. The unexpected challenges of life can appear without any warning. The storms of life can wreak havoc on your emotional state. Even little things like working with someone that drives you up the wall, if you let them get to you it can impact on your emotional well- being and your happiness. It helps to remember that no one is responsible or in control of your happiness. You are not in control of other people’s behavior. You should never force someone or circumstances, you may face to change when change is impossible.  Some people may never change, some circumstances may never change no matter how hard you may try to change them. When this happens to just have the ability to let go of what is out of your control and acknowledging situations that you can’t change, you will stop unnecessary stress, anger, resentment and as a result you will help keep your emotional well-being healthy.

Do not let go of your Integrity

Some people go about finding happiness the wrong way and for all the wrong reasons. They may, for example pursue Power and Wealth in the mistaken belief that these things will help them find their happiness. Trying to achieve things like Power and Wealth may cause some people to be willing to do whatever it takes in achieving this objective. Some people will find that they are willing to compromise their own integrity in order to be able to achieve their chosen desires.  When you compromise your integrity you may find that you might begin having sleepless nights, and feelings of uneasiness. Going against your own integrity is one way to a life of unhappiness. When pursuing a goal always make sure it aligns with your integrity and values. Here is a great video if you find yourself struggling with trying to work out your values.

I hope this post has helped you to see that your happiness is not dependent on your situation or other people. Being happy is a state of mind and it is possible to achieve by learning how to manage your feelings and emotions.  Here is a link to a previous post that ties in well with this subject and teaches how to create a positive mindset.

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